The gleeps are back in town with another Bankmas Eve episode. I hope you remember what was happening in Stephanie's date book, because we sure don't. The book is finally starting to get exciting! There are three new characters in this chapter, including Baby T. Also, remember how the whole point of this book is the date and how to ruin it? Yeah. The date finally starts in this chapter...wait...actually...it doesn't. Oh well. Maybe next time.
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THE GLEEPENING 3 (01:26:12)
The Gleepening is back. That means we finished another year of the pod. To celebrate we are talking about mimes and ghost hunters. There is a quick audio analysis before we start a rousing game of the fan favorite - mental tic tac toe. We also play hangman (which is really good in an audio format) because we are amazing podcast hosts. Also, we completely overhaul and fix every sport that exists. Every. Sport.
P.S. you are allowed to laugh at Colton because he doesn't know how to properly spell cantaloupe.
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Bankmas Eve III-3 (02:03:03)
Another Bankmas Eve episode is here...who would've guessed. Seems a little late since it's February, but the show must go on. Will Stephanie Tanner finally tell us how to wreck a date in even one way in this episode? No.
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Bankmas Eve III-2 (02:22:31)
Bankmas Eve 3 is back for a second part...and we all know what that means. With more Bankmas Eve 3 comes more of Stephanie Tanner's problems. Will we even learn one out of the ten ways to wreck a date in this part of the book? No. No we will not. SPOILER ALERT by the way.
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Bankmas Eve III (01:32:35)
Today is Bankmas Eve, and to celebrate we are going to be reading from our favorite book. It also wouldn't feel right if we didn't revisit the Treasury of American Humor, for the first time in a long time, in order to tell let you experience the best story ever written. This is a full time reading episode, so buckle your belt and tie your shoes.
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Naked Lawn Darts (01:32:10)
Wouldn't it be funny if cartoons were Chinese? No, I'm not talking about Chinese cartoons. I'm specifically talking about cartoons dubbed over by a Chinese guy. We also cast the actors for our brand new movie based on Rock, Paper, Scissors (we will discuss the plot at a later date if this episode gets two upvotes and/or if we feel like it). On top of all of that, Brad is back (yeah, same Brad), and Joey's not too happy. Also, bugle riddle.
Have you ever played naked lawn darts?
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Have you ever met any other poohs?
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Food Wheel (01:35:04)
Noah is constantly finding teeth everywhere he goes, and the Tooth Fairy won't do anything about it. Colton has a brand new business idea. We also read some 60+ soup jokes and discuss the differences between our Thanksgiving dinners.
P.S. The pod picture was not changed to a picture of a buffet because it was downloaded was a WEBP file, just look up a picture of a buffet (furniture) for full immersion into this episode.
Want to know Noah's racist soup joke?
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Have you been keeping track of our pod sneezes?
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Taco Bell | Gleep of Faith (01:34:43)
cheesy roll up
Sub Classes (01:21:59)
This episode starts off like any other classic episode that we've ever released. We even delve into the inner workings of working at Subway, however; enjoyment can't last forever, not when the threat of the worst and most confusing fast food item ever created looms in the back of our minds. The cheesy roll up from Taco Bell is so disturbing, it took over this episode completely and also the next one.
Have you ever taken a sub class?
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Do you have any "birds have feathers" thoughts that I can add to my list?
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Kidnapping | Gleep of Faith (01:44:43)
This one is all about being kidnapped. Join us as we discover who Amber Alert really was, and learn about multiple different kidnappings. Don't worry, it's not all sadness and sniffles, we make sure to leave this episode with a happy ending...relatively speaking of course. I don't know, maybe riddles will cheer everyone up.
Have you been kidnapped? Email us and we will try to help you.
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Butcher On Glelm Street (01:09:12)
This episode is a death episode. We start by discussing the presidential assassination attempt that everyone has been talking about. We then move our conversation to the famous killings of the London Stabber. And finally, Noah hatches a plan to enact a new law by explaining Budd Dwyer's death to Governor Tim Walz.
When do you think 'Ol James C. is going to die?
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Did you know the name of the Midnight Tipster before we figured it out?
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Back To The Badlands (01:07:16)
It's story time in this one folks. We are leaving the Baja to take you all the way back to the good old days of one year ago to explain what exactly went down when we left on our westward expansion. Storms, coffee, and Cody...those words will mean a lot more to you once you've listened to the episode.
Do you have a lobster shirt?
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How many cups of coffee can you drink?
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Texas Twelve (01:17:54)
We are going back to school for this one. Colton doesn't remember anything, and Noah remembers too much. There's some talk about the war that happened in Mexico, and we try to get a GED so we can drop out in 8th grade. Also, is Scooby Doo racist?
Do you remember 2nd grade?
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Do you know how to crack an egg without making any omelets?
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Dodge Chrysler And Ram (01:45:57)
It's time to find out once and for all if we are smarter than a first grader. Afterwards, we start a group text chain with everyone we graduated with to plan a birthday party...well...not everyone we graduated with. Not everyone we graduated with is that great of a person. You will understand that more once we explain it to you. Also, Colton talks about his future plan for the podcast, and why he started the podcast in the first place.
Do nuts make you nuts?
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Do you verbs in English?
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Cinnaminute Hour (01:46:27)
Vacation mode activated. The Gleeps are in the Baja. We don't know where that is, but it isn't important. Colton plans to run for office and he explains how he plans to win. A brief discussion occurs about how strokes actually work, which leads into a less brief discussion on whether or not babies like cinnamon. It sort of seems like it's just an acquired taste.
Would you let Colton feed your baby cinnamon?
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Are you voting for Pel E. in the upcoming election?
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Time Is A Gift (01:41:42)
2 Gleeps is back, baby! And it's Maypril fools. The Gleeps explain the tribulations that they went through to mourn the passing of the inhabitants of the Titan submersible, and how, after all this time, they were finally able to come to terms with the fact that there was nothing to even mourn about. Ken Jennings has his super hero alter ego exposed in this episode. Also, Colton talks about his go to gift to give to his family at Christmas, and the lengths that he goes to in order to make sure it's memorable. Welcome to season 3 Gleeps.
IF YOU ARE COLTON'S FAMILY, PLEASE DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE.
Do you know any time dealers? Please tell us how to find them.
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Did you hear the number station in the background of this episode? If you did, let us know where.
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THE GLEEPENING 2 (01:13:19)
Happy Valentime, exactly two years after this podcast started, this episode was posted. It is a special episode because I say it is. What makes it special? Doesn't matter. We talk about Asians and apes in this episode...other things too, but the other stuff doesn't matter.
Bear Vaults (01:08:30)
Not much to bring up about this episode, except that Noah is going through second puberty. He also thoroughly explains how he is saving the world by killing bears. Also, Colton makes a ground breaking discovery about Native American Indians.
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Bankmas Eve II-2 (01:24:54)
Bankmas Eve is back again. Probably a whole lot sooner than you thought. Unless you actually believed that we would only give you 47 minutes worth of Bankmas Eve celebrations this year. Just admit it. You got Bankmas fooled.
We managed to get the whole gang together in this episode to discuss credit cards, game shows, and Sprite Remix. You know...all the most festive topics. Also, there is a bonus Gleep of Faith mini episode hidden inside this episode. You might be able to spot it if you keep your ears peeled.
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Falling | Gleep of Faith (01:30:18)
This one is all about falling. We want more people to fall and get hurt. WE DO NOT NECESSARILY WISH FOR PEOPLE TO DIE FROM FALLING (though we don't not necessarily wish for it either). Join us as we stumble our way through many different scenarios, and read poems that are only tangentially related. Also, congratulations if you've recently found out that you are having a clown.
This is the final poem that was mentioned in the episode that was too long to read - https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/42716/falling-56d22155e5c45
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Bankmas Eve II (00:47:32)
Bankmas Eve is back again. Join us in celebrating another day that exists solely to give banks another excuse to close for the day. We talk about a lot of things in this episode...and all of them are a secret. I say that mostly because I edited this episode many months ago, and have mostly forgotten what we actually talk about. Enjoy anyway though.
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Phil Osopher’s Stone (01:24:57)
Ruffles, presidents, philosophers, riddles...this episode has it all. Also, somehow we went an entire episode talking about philosophers without asking who Phil Osopher was, so I put it in the title to forever shame us for missing the most obvious joke of the episode. Thank you, and goodnight.
Do you like Ruffle chips?
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Do you like Ike?
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High Fructose Corn Syrup | Gleep of Faith (01:13:01)
Welcome back to Gleep of Faith. You probably thought this was a one a done series...wrong. This time we discuss everything to do with everyone's favorite drink. But before we talk about breast milk, we also talk a little about everyone's favorite state of matter when it comes to corn...syrup.
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Changing The Chunnel (01:29:37)
The Gleeps are officially back with this new batch of episodes. I guess you could even consider this "season 2"...only if you want to though. You don't have to.
Colton is having auto problems. Noah is having autoimmune problems. Colton is a terrorist. Noah is inventing Spanish. Colton is an English pacifist Hitler. Noah is solving the "Chunnel Problem".
Does Benghazi mean anything to you?
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What is your final solution?
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Life Alert | Gleep of Faith (01:18:48)
This is the first ever episode of "Gleep of Faith", our new podcast which is weirdly a little more structured than our normal episodes...not much...but a little. In this one we fully discuss everything to do with Life Alert. That's it. That's the concept.
Send an email about your favorite Life Alert.
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I was almost out of my supply of remaining bonus episodes, but luckily I remembered my broken laptop. I went to go get it fixed, and was thankfully able to recover a decent amount of episodes from it. On the laptop I found more bonus episodes, a decent amount of normal full length episodes, a large backlog of Gleep of Faith episodes, and even a Bankmas Eve episode and a The Gleepening episode we decided to record while we had some free time. Since they are longer episodes and normally take longer to edit, we didn't want to risk not being able to find time to get them taken care of closer to when they were originally scheduled to be released.
TL;DR: I found more episodes :)
